Sunday, January 15, 2012

Football Fanatic

When I was about 15 years old, my dad sat me down one day to give me the "talk". Imagine my initial thoughts; "Oh My God...ewww, not that Dad" and,"Not with you, where's Mom?" most definitely, "This is the most embarrassing moment of my life, I hope my friends never find out".

My dad squirmed in his seat, clearly as uncomfortable as me, but at the time I was in middle of the worst of the teenage years and I knew my younger sister was hiding somewhere giggling, so my dad's discomfort took back seat to that. Thank God there was no you-tube back then. The mortification of that would have been tragic, retribution would have been swift. 

Before my dad could start I blurted out, "Dad I already know about the birds and bees, we learned about it in Health Class." Back then it was taught by the football coaches, talk about the perfect birth control plan,  I still cringe when I think about the description of the female anatomy by a man old enough to be my own dad. I'm still scarred by his description of various STD's. ((shudder))

I remember the total look of fear on my dad's face and thought it was because I already knew, but boy was I wrong. As he sputtered and squirmed and turned beet red, his shiny bald head looked like a traffic light.

"Oh, uh, well that's good I suppose but not at all what I meant." He said as soon as he got composure.

I tilted my head in total confusion. "What did you mean then Dad?"

"Football." He said with total conviction, as if the very word should be explanation enough.

"Football?" Now I have had many moments of complete 'lost-in-space' in my life, but this one would definitely go down as one of the most memorable.

"Yes, football. I think it's time you watched the Pro games with your mother and I on Sundays and college games on Saturdays." Then he gave me that 'dad' look that said, "you will do this if you know whats good for you".

I wanted to blurt out, "Are ya fucking crazy?" of course I didn't because using that word back then would have meant death by hanging.

So I just meekly said, "Ok Dad". Yes I was a wimp but I also respected the man, and liked my freedom.

Up until this point in my life my Dad and I had the typical father-daughter relationship; he didn't get me I didn't get him, and we were happy with that. After that day everything changed and we got to know each other a whole lot better.

My mom would say it was important to like sports if I wanted a strong relationship with my future husband, my dad said it was to show I was capable of being his partner in every way. For me it was the beginning of a life long love of football.

My dad has been gone over a decade now, but not a Sunday from August to January goes by that I don't think of him in his Lazy-Boy yelling at the screen giving the guys his two cents.

I miss my dad everyday but I know he would be so proud to know that I am still to this day a HUGE Football Fanatic!!!

(He might however be a little squeamish if he knew I was mentally seeing some of the men in a torrid love affair with each other, I'll save that story for another day).

So for my dad, Go Texans!!!!



  1. From one Footbal FANatic to another... Are you ready for the the Texans to whoop the Ravens?

    I love football. the uniforms, and the men who wear them. There is something amazing about men going out to do battle over a ball. And I'm there with you, fantasizing about love affairs between the guys! (need a foster/yates fanfiction haha)

  2. I think you don't know football until you play (Aussie Rules - Ruby League - Rugby Union) what you guys call football has way too much padding - LOL.

    Emb' it is a great way to remember your dad.

    1. Thanks, I think he would have liked it too.....he was a pretty In-touch-with-his-feminine side and very open minded